This breaks my heart. I am so glad though that you are able to process through everything in safety and security. It can be so difficult to let go of the good because of the bad, but necessary. This period is a difficult one, as your mind and heart must heal from all the trauma you’ve dealt with. It is where you must reconcile your loss of the beautiful as well as understand and rejoice in the freedom. I appreciate the raw telling of your pain. You are beautiful, important, special, and a wonderful person with lots to share and give. Never forget that!